recovery Your connection operation Steps

How do I start rescue my relationship?

Saving your relationship is no separate from rescue anything else. The very first thing is to design and get clear on the fact that your relationship is indispensable to you and it's worth saving. You've got to stop taking it for granted and doing the things that contribute to its erosion. Your next step is to collate the damage....

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How do I work out what's going wrong in my relationship?

Take a long cool look at your relationship issues. It will be easy for you to write down all your grievances about your partner... So don't! Instead, hold the mirror up to yourself and ask, 'What am I doing that is manufacture this relationship go bad?'. Be honest with yourself. What do you do deliberately to press your partner's emotional buttons? If you want things to change, you have to start changing Your behaviour.

What if my partner is not willing to change?

Many couples become very childish as their relationship goes into stormy waters. They design an over-sensitivity to the equilibrium of give and take in a relationship and get very irate if they feel that their partner isn't contributing their fair share to the partnership. This can devolve into a kind of negative tit-for-tat warring: 'You didn't put the garbage out, so I'm not doing the dishes!' Unfortunately super loving relationships don't work on the principle of the 50-50 partnership. If you want to save your relationship, you need to accept 100% of the accountability for rescue it. You've got to give 100% loving energy to it -- even if your partner is doing nothing.

How do I heal the damage?

Your cool estimate will delineate your personal contribution to the downturn in your relationship. The easy turnaround is to stop doing those things. Use the theory that Maxwell Maltz talked about in his book, 'Psycho-Cybernetics'. Visualise your typical relationship scenarios in your mind and instead of re-acting in the old way, see yourself acting in new certain ways. See your relationship blossoming with love. That's all that matters -- that 'love is all around'. See it first in your mind's eye, then do all things you can to put it out there. Be nice, be kind. It can be unrewarding at first, particularly if your relationship had become spiteful. Even if your partner seems like a stubbornly immovable object, the gradual, persistent drip drip of your loving ways cannot fail to carve a way back into his or her heart.

What else can I do?

Apologise for hurting your partner. This is a very brave step and takes a lot of self-honesty. You have to be the initiator, the one who steps up to the plate as it were. Just say you are sorry for the pain you may have caused. Don't try to interpret yourself at this point, even if they come back at you with added accusations. Just apologise and reiterate your love for them. Say how prominent they are to you and how you want to have a astounding loving relationship with them. If you're lucky, they might apologise to you as well. But don't go finding for it -- instead forgive them for the pain you think they have caused you. Forgiveness means to 'let go of', and you are going to let go of the inner wounds and grievances that you've been attributing to your partner. You're searching for a new more loving way of being now...

How can I transform this into a astounding loving relationship?

We have too many examples of crappy relationships and not enough examples of great relationships. Tv, gossip magazines, and the majority of movies focus on destructive, over-dramatised relationships, with couples being nasty to each other and/or splitting up. No wonder we have such problem with relationships, when our inner template of 'a relationship' is so warped. We are feeding our subconscious mind with all those destructive examples! Instead you can emulate thriving couples who are full of love for each other. So change your mentors, and copy those couples who are deeply in love.

Where can I find help?

If you want a complete roadmap to rebuilding your relationship, 'Saving Your Marriage With Love and Trust' shows how you can save your marriage even if you have given up all hope. gawk the easy theory that can swiftly bring your spouse back even if you're the only one who wants to save the relationship. This program guarantees quick and easy steps that you can do immediately that can help bring the two of you back together again.

Copyright 2007 Anne Amore

recovery Your connection operation Steps